Best Story from the Road...

I went to the mall today. Twice. This wasn't my intent. I took Finn this morning. He has learned a new skill since last time he and I went malling.(is that a legitimate verb?) Now whenever we enter a clothing store he yells "no!" and better yet, whenever he sees something in that clothing store he doesn't like he blows raspberries. Oh yes, an award winning shopper this one will be.

He and I went to look at Easter/Confirmation dresses for me and Easter clothes for the munchkins. Let's just say anyone who walked past the dressing room probably thought I had one hideous case of gas with the noises that were flowing out of there. Needless to say I didn't get a dress. Who could buy something when their dressing room critique gives them that kind of feedback? As for Easter clothes for the munchkins, it all starts with Lily's dress. Even though she and I had been here before, today I found more dresses I thought she might like better. I stressed out and bought nothing. I decided I needed her with me. Let me just tell you, this is not abnormal. I have so many friends who love shopping and find it so therapeutic. I've decided I might as well if I could a) make a decision or b) had the resources to chose multiple things and take them home to try things out or c) just has enough $$ that I didn't have to decide, I could just buy what I want. Until such time comes though, I will continue to stand glassy eyed in children's clothing stores doing massive amounts of math in my head and trying to decide if this one will itch, or this one will cause a tantrum, if this one will be too hot, if this one will keep us from buying groceries this week, or if these shades of green are too far apart to coordinate.

Coordinating. Do you do this? My kids are almost 11, almost 4, and almost 2. Do you know the difficulty level in creating coordinating ensembles for children with this age spread? There ought to be bonus bucks at Gymboree for successfully completing this challenge. It's even harder if you don't actually have any of them in matching (same exact item in different sizes) clothes, but simply an attractive mix of items that all look like they came off the same cute little catalog family. I have given up doing this anytime but Christmas, Easter, and an occasional big event, like a wedding. I do totally enjoy the challenge, if I didn't why would I go through such torture?

I came home this morning empty handed. I was rewarded by an almost 2 year old napping on the way home from the mall. He slept just long enough to pick Dax up from preschool and come home. Ah, the joy of a no nap afternoon!

Lily came home from school with her Justice (formerly known as Limited too) catalog in hand a sob story about how it was 70's week and she had no clothes that would work for 70's day or Tye Dye day and we needed to go to the mall. Most days I would have laughed. But today happened to be the day that I had already been there once and had returned home to check the status of the skirt I was sure she wanted online only to find that they were out of the right size. If she really wanted that particular one we would have to return quickly to the Children's Place to purchase the one and only one they had left in her size.

We waited for Mike. I'm not so naive as to think I could take all three and enjoy the experience. It was raining. No, it was pouring and blowing. We went back to the mall. Why does a school need to have a spirit week that involves the parents having to purchase new clothes for the kids to wear to school? We saw others there from Lily' school doing the same thing. Who knew that really unattractive polyester spandexy(is that a word??) 70ish clothes were back in the stores? I don't know if they are actually 70's. To be honest all I remember about 70's dressing is my parents love of the disco scene, what people wore on Soul Train (yes, I totally loved this show and watched in my formative years), and one long patchwork dress that I had when I was about 2. Really, I wasn't much help. I remember the fabric felt icky. I remember that I liked dresses. Lily seemed to think it was all about peace signs, although I'm sure that was the 60's. My mom validated this, but said it trickled into the early 70's so it was legit. Whatever. Lily chose a rather cute pink patchwork baby doll type top from Justice. We forgot our 25% off card from the catalog, but the chicka at the counter was nice enough to give it to us anyway. Yay, her! I'm not sure this top is very 70's. The fabric felt nice and it is actually kind of cute, but hey who was I to argue? For tye dye day I told her I was not buying anymore clothing unless it was a really cheap scarf. We found tye dye nail polish. Interesting. As for Easter clothes...

This will require a new paragraph. Lily chose a dress. It was a totally different color scheme than we originally planned. We had to change thoughts on the boy clothes. I had to call Mike and discuss fundage. We went back to Gap and bought the green, khaki, and navy dress. We went back to Children's Place to buy the khaki linen pants & green linen shirt for Dax and plaid khaki/navy/green shorts & navy polo for Finn. Guess what? The dress isn't green/navy/khaki. It's green/black/khaki. Guess what else? The boy's green and Lily's green they aren't exactly the same. Actually they clash, so much so that Lily started gagging and laughing when she say them side by side. This is the girl that feels four shades of pink in the same outfit is just gorgeous. It was bad. I didn't buy the boys clothes. I will be returning Lily's dress. I still accomplished nothing. Well I did get Mike a birthday gift. I hope he's as excited about it as his daughter. He will be. It's me who totally would have passed it by had it not been for my dear Lily and her pressure filled stares!

Ahhh...are you ready for that story yet? Or are you sleeping?
**Mom, warning, Dad is mentioned in the following paragraph**

I mentioned the rain. On the way home it was worse. It was dark. It was very windy. It was raining so hard you couldn't see the lines on the highway. Lightening blazed across the sky. I was silent, hands glued to the wheel. Lily had been very quiet, but then she leaned forward behind me and said, "I've been in weather much worse than this before. You and Dad weren't even there. It was just me and Papa. The rest of you had all gone to Lowes. There was a terrible storm. (I must mention, Lily has a terrible storm phobia, tornadoes or the threat of them make her almost nuts) The tornado alarms started to go off. Papa built a cave with pillows in the hallway at Nana's house. He made a hole just big enough for me in a place where I could still peek out and see the TV because he knew I wanted to know what was going on. He stayed close by. I was safe. We just waited for you all to come home."

If you didn't know my dad, this may not sound like the "best story from the road", but if you did, I bet you get it. When she told me he built her a cave made of pillows I started to tear up. My dad was not the patient sort. At least from my perspective I can't imagine him not finding her fear irrational. He didn't. He made her a cave of pillows. He remembered that she'd want to see the TV. He made her feel safe. I didn't know these things until tonight. He was a good Papa.

I'm so thankful that Lily has memories. I wish he'd had time to build more with the boys. Saturday is the 1 year anniversary of his death. This week has been far more emotionally charged than I thought it would be. I really thought I had a handle on it. Maybe not. Or maybe it's just normal. It's possible that in order to be in control I have not fully faced all of this past year's loses on a raw, emotional level. What I do know is that my life is full of daily joy and I am so blessed to have the family I have and these little stories that pop up out of the blue. For that I am truly grateful and the rest I will lay in God's hands, cause Lord knows I can't do it by myself!