On being Transparent and Thank Yous

So, you know how some moms are one way in public and another way at home? Some have their "church faces"? That was one thing I appreciated about my mom. Authenticity. I don't ever remember her being two different people. Now there are others in the family, I won't mention names, but there are others that I learned had great Sunday game face. A smile that said "we're a perfect family" but the truth was when the doors closed it was far from perfection.

I think when I had Lily I had a bit more of a "game face". I was so worried that people would think she was anything other than the perfect princess she was and I was anything other than the perfect doting mother. I bought books like Teach your baby to Read, Teach Your Baby Math. I had read Charlotte's Web and Little Women to her by the time she was 2 1/2. We read all the time. She knew all of her relatives full names before she was two. By that age, she could tell you her phone number and address, the capitol of most of the 50 states, and could hear a song on the radio, name the song and the singer, and if we had the flash cards made(which we had about fifty 2000ish popular country singers) she could hear a song, tell you the song name, find the singers picture, then find their name on a separate card and bring them to me. Yes, I worked hard with that one. She was reading at three, she was quite amazing!

What I didn't know then that I know now is that no matter how hard I worked and how much I read, I could not create a child God did not create. She had those capabilities because He gave them to her. She was not perfect. I was not even close to perfect. For some reason though, I felt that I must show the world that I was, in fact, the perfect mother.

Fast forward 8 or so years to a spring ahead rainy Sunday morning. That mother I was 8 years ago, oh, that poor girl would have been horrified! Dax, he has an addiction. Candy. Any kind really will do. This is why we don't keep it in the house. Today, I'm sure everyone inside the church building heard the wrath of this addiction. His friend, who he calls , "Little Sarah" had some candy hearts, a baggie full. He, being the great detective that he is, figured out they must have come from her Sunday School class. I told him I would ask, but that if they did he could not have any because she is in a different class than he is. His sweet teacher from last year offered him a handful that she had left over. He began to thrash, to turn red, to scream that "I want the whole bag!!!!". Quickly, horribly embarrassed at his rudeness we tried to duck out.

He screamed loud enough that I'm sure he disrupted the service going on right outside the classroom door.

So, for transparencies sake, those of you in the church building, I apologize for interrupting your service. My son is not perfect and his deep addiction to candy causes him to be rude and uncaring to all those around him. We are trying to find a 12 step program for this....

Maybe if I made him some flash cards with pictures of candy and the the candymakers names. Hmmm...really, I'm kidding. I have lost all enthusiam for flashcards these days.

Moving on to the parking lot scene. For those of you who were leaving after Sunday School or entering the building for the third service I would like, to note that I was not beating or torturing my youngest son. I was however, extremely annoyed with him for continuously going limp as I was trying to walk him to the car holding his hand while my other hand was very full. I used words like "stop it, quit, you're going to hurt yourself, Finn Patrick" in a very stern, raised tone. I even dropped my Bible and picked him up under one arm to escort him the rest of the way (this was when I noticed other people around). I was not patient. I was up too early. I was flustered that Dax was acting like a heathen and I was annoyed. And there you have it people, I snap at my kids. I do this at home, and just as often in public, sometimes even at church. I wish I was better at this but truth be told, that's me, still far from perfect, but not really caring anymore if the world knows it.

God knew it with Lily. God knows it with my boys, and well so does everyone in or around our church at 10:45 this morning. Oh yes, that girl, the one from 8 or so years ago, she would have been horrified!

I'm so glad He loved her then and He loves me now. I have to be confident in th fact that He has a sense of humor, and even on our bad days he gets a little amusment!

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Thank Yous & blessings!

Mike and I went out last night. Really out! We have not been out alone together since sometime early in November. It was so nice to see a movie, have some dinner, just be. The night may not have gone according to plan exactly but it was so nice to have it!

Last night would not have been possible without two of my favorite girls stepping in and taking care of my kids! Abbey and Hayley, thank you. All three of my kids were asleep when I returned. What a nice way to come home. I've never before walked out of my house after kissing all three of my children and my two babysitters goodbye. I love you guys. I hope you'll come back soon. I'm going to have to open a savings account for you . =) PS Super Dax says you can come back and play anytime!

A special thank you to their Mamas for not killing us for being a tad later than planned and for letting us borrow these girls!

We actually made it to church almost on time and saw both of Lily's performances! This hasn't happened in a while. I was afraid that Lily might call DCFS if we missed another early morning performance. 8 is early, especially when it was really 7. But there we were, all four of us (Lily was there at 7:20), fully dressed, sitting in church by 8:05. Thank God for little miracles!

Thank you to my husband for hanging in there with me over the last couple of month. I couldn't have made it without you!

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The Story of the "Grabber Nabber"

My aunt and uncle are some of the best people you might meet. They'd do just about anything for those they love. One day they read this girl's blog about how she could not get up and down to pick up her floors after her surgery. They saw horrific pictures of messes made by boys who might just take over the house. They felt bad. They had a solution. It came in the mail this week...

Dax immediately deemed it the grabber nabber. He has a million uses for it. Reaching high things, pinching his siblings from a distance, and driving the dog nuts. Lily was mesmerized when she came home and laid eyes upon the grabber nabber. She found she could use it to empty the dishwasher. Putting away high glasses did make me a bit nervous, but for some things, it works. She used it to pick up dirty laundry, dirty diapers, and of course to pinch her siblings. Finn has learned to pick up legos, it's great for hand eye coordination. He can't quite get the pinching thing down, but it does give him a good poking range. He can get them and have a good start before they chase him down and take it from him. The grabber nabber has had several "time outs" and I did have to refuse the request to take it in the bathtub. I must admit though, I do wish I had had this a few weeks ago. Even though I now can reach the floor over and over this thing lets me get behind and under without gymnastics moves and twister positions. I can reach higher, I can throw farther, I can pinch my children! =)

Thanks Aunt Lynda & Uncle Steve. We are finding oh so many things to do with one grabber nabber! Who knew it could be so much fun!